The latest edition of  MaltaCEOs.mt’s Work and Wealth Watch series where Money Coach Luca Caruana gives his expert responses to all your questions related to money, work and wealth. Want to see your own questions answered on MaltaCEOs.mt? Send your questions on info@moneycoachinghub.com

Dear Luca,
A few months ago, I changed jobs. In my previous role as an HR Manager, I was earning EUR 36,000 – now I am earning almost twenty thousand more.

Although I usually consider myself a careful spender and planner, this significant change in my income brought about a feeling that I deserved to spend a bit more. However, and this even surprised me, I didn’t just spend a bit more – I went out of control.

The other strange thing is that everything I was buying felt like a need rather than a want. These included new clothes, a new iPhone, and other items that, although they might seem materialistic, felt necessary to match the new lifestyle expected of me in my new job. Why do I say this?

My new colleagues have these new things. They drive better cars than my old Toyota Vitz, dine at nicer restaurants and cafés than I used to, and live in more upscale neighbourhoods than I do.

This led me to try to keep up with them and, for the first time in 10 years (the time I’ve lived in my home), even consider moving to a better house in a nicer neighbourhood.

All of this is causing tension with my husband, and I am also feeling far more anxious than before. Yet, I can’t seem to find a way out of this situation. I love my new role and the environment it brings; it’s just these issues that I need to tackle.

How possible is it to find a balance without sacrificing this new role and lifestyle?

Concerned Spender

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Luca Responds

Dear Concerned Spender,

Thank you for sharing your concerns openly here. You are experiencing a mix of instant gratification and the pressure of keeping up with the Joneses.

It is very normal for people earning more to go on a spending spree, especially if they haven’t planned how to manage their new income. It happened to me a few years ago. I got a promotion—not as significant in terms of salary increase as yours—but it came with an extra EUR 300 per month. I didn’t make a plan for it, and before I knew it, that money was absorbed into my expenses. Months later, when I wanted to use it for something meaningful, it was already allocated to new expenditures I hadn’t had before. All those new expenses felt like needs, and once I committed to them, they were surprisingly difficult to give up.

When I got another salary increase a year later, I made sure to plan for it. I’m not saying I didn’t use some of it to improve my lifestyle, but I made sure that half went into savings. This way, it didn’t feel like the extra money disappeared into the usual flow of life’s expenses.

I also used a portion of it for self-development—a choice that eventually led me to start my own business, creating a new revenue stream that didn’t exist before.

So, you see, you can use your extra income to create other opportunities for growth and financial security.

Now, you mentioned that reducing your current expenditure feels almost impossible because you’re trying to keep up with others. I have to ask you—are these choices more important than your relationship with your husband, which is clearly being strained by them? Does the idea of being like your colleagues truly outweigh the benefits of a strong financial plan, less financial stress, and better sleep at night?

Life is full of choices. Yes, we must constantly revisit and update our financial goals as we grow, but we shouldn’t do this at the expense of our overall happiness. True fulfilment comes from balancing all the things you love—your new job, your relationship with your husband, and your personal wellbeing.

I hope this helps.

Luca

The Money Coach, from the Money Coaching Hub

CEO & Founder of Monipal

Measure your Money Health in 1 Minute: https://moneycoachluca.scoreapp.com/

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